Are you co-dependent? Co-dependency can be described as relationship addiction. It is just as real as an addiction to drugs, food, sex or alcohol.
Are you in a Co-dependent Relationship?
Have you been described as being a
Do you have difficulty
- Setting healthy boundaries
- Valuing yourself
- Communicating your needs
Do you fear
Are you so involved with another person, you ignore your own needs?
Do you constantly make poor choices in partners and friends?
I can help. Clinical hypnotherapy can assist with low self-esteem and emotional co-dependency issues. Negative self-image and emotional dependency can begin in childhood. We continue patterns until we change our ‘negative’ self-talk. I can assist you release your fears and concerns. After discussion I can make suggestions through hypnotherapy, and we can begin the positive journey towards healthy self-esteem and emotional independence.
Case Studies of Co-Dependency
Co-dependency can take many forms. Controlling behaviour or being controlled by others can begin in our origin family. When we grow-up the behaviour continues and sometimes it is hard to recognise it, as it was the norm for us.
Tom learnt to let go
Tom* grew up with parents that were alcoholic, as a consequence Tom became the caretaker in his family. As an adult he drank and Tom began to date women who drank. He vacillated between taking care of women he drank with and drinking abusively with them. A classic co-dependent alcoholic. He eventually met a woman who had given up alcohol and he decided to quit. They began their life together confident that alcohol was no longer part of their life. But after their first child Tom’s wife relapsed. Tom took on the caretaker role, one he knew so well. His wife would quit drinking for a while but relapse time and time again. Tom was powerless to make her stop. He raged at her and couldn’t understand why she just didn’t stop like him. That ultimately was his lesson, Tom had to learn to stop trying to control her and detach. The process of ‘letting go’ means giving up thinking about what the other person should do. The obsession to control others or places and situations is not our job. If we are willing to ‘let, go’ the result is gratifying and will be mean a peaceful life.
Carly lets things rest
When we are co-dependent we have an overwhelming desire to resolve situations or conflict immediately. This was Carly’s role in her origin family, one she continued through adulthood until she could no longer handle the ‘drama’ of her family members always coming to her for resolution. Carly has learnt that she can’t change anyone but herself. Learning she can survive a family crisis has been freeing. Carly had to let others make whatever choices they felt compelled to make. She had to accept those choices and she no longer takes their choices personally. She had to detach to ‘let things rest’. Differing opinions or disagreement no longer hold her hostage. Carly learnt tools to empower her to give her serenity but continue to love her family.
Sarah revised expectations
Sarah suffered feelings of jealousy, insecurity and vulnerability for many years with significant men in her life. Sarah was dependent on men to make her life meaningful. Whether the attention was good or bad she was attached and would try to meet the other person’s needs rather than her own. Like a lot of us, self-esteem issues begin when we are young. We believe we are unworthy, stupid, too ordinary. Learning that this was never true doesn’t immediately re-write the script in our minds. When we have expectations of how we want a person to be we are setting ourselves up for disappointment. Sarah learnt that she had to separate herself from these relationships and give up her expectations of others.
Sarah’s wish to simply live her own life, with no expectations was achieved when she learnt how to detach and voice her own needs.
*All names have been changed